Thursday, September 26, 2013

Songs about ASS...Don't Dare Judge Me!

Sometimes I feel like posting music shit on 5ivebruhs for me is just a cop out.  I like to challenge myself and as a musician who can talk about the subject for hours I fight the urge to make it a habit on this format.  I will say this.  As a musician I have had to evolve in terms of taste level.  As a young man and student of music in college I was the biggest snob of music ever.  Rap had to have a message.  Dance music  post 1989 might as well have never existed.  If you didn't get Jazz you were an idiot.  It was bad.  And it was stupid.  For years I shut myself off of some great music.  Later on I adopted a new philosophy and allowed myself to experience new music and to appreciate the shit that before I would have judged you for listening to making me a much more satisfied listener.  What adopting this philosophy also did was make me the local rap police.  Basically the defender of all things rap against the tyranny of the judgemental white person. I remember once about a year and a half ago while in grad school I was at a party drunk as all hell and Im pretty sure I was the only Black dude there.  Some white dude made a negative statement about whatever popular rap song of the time whose subject was "ass".  Mannn I got mad, not because he was talking about rap but because he didnt know shit about rap.  His mocking of my beloved "stripper rap" hit me to the core.  I was immediately transported to sweaty college parties where multicolor vats of alcoholic Kool Aid spilled onto perspiring lynolium floors and shirts ceased to be a requirement after the first hour of dancing your ass off.  I got mad because I knew that dude that was talking all that shit have never experienced an awesome party like that so he had no room to talk about songs about ass.  I love songs about ass.  They dont try to trick you into thinking they have a deeper message.  They're straight to the point.  And honestly what straight man would dislike a song that once the play button is pressed has a Weekend at Bernies 2 affect on woman's asses?  Now with that said here are my favorite songs about ASS.  Some are CLASSICS some are fairly new, all of them inspire the kind of acrobatics you only see in places with now windows.  Gotta love that.

So here it is.  No particular order but the last one is number 1 which needs to be acknowledged.

A$$-Big Sean

Clappers - Wale

Doing the Butt- EU

Bands a Make her Dance- Juicy Jay

Donk-Souljah Boy

Ms New Booty-Bubba Sparxxx


Back that Azz Up-Juvenile



 And I KNOW you got some ones to add to this so comment below and let me know what you think!

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

A Male's Blunt Perspective on Life's Relationships


Bare with me on this one, it might sound a little disjointed, but I've had some recent conversations and experiences that have sparked this article.


Now that the disclaimer is out of the way, I can say what I've concluded. There are huge differences in the way guys see the relationships they have in their lives versus how women view theirs. Why do we subject ourselves to relationships in the first place? Is it a primal instinct derived from the times when community meant survival? If so, is that really necessary now? Those who choose not to have these stabilized relationships are usually seen as "weird" or in a lot of cases "socially awkward" but I feel there is more to it. To go along with the mental illness article written last week, how often is it said that these people that perform these heinous acts have social issues. Think of how much pressure society puts on every person, its honestly not a surprise that people are snapping left and right. Hell I feel at any moment I can have pressure to snap, but I guess my "saneness" prevents that. Whatever.

I've had several conversations with my male friends about what it takes to be a good friend or companion. Whether its been a drunken rant between us or a thoughtful analytic conversation, there was one theme they continued to pop up. And its all about getting "screwed over". But how crazy is that? You allow someone to get close to you as long as you don't fail. You don't have to excel at being my friend, you just have to not be terrible. Honor roll isn't necessary, and D's are technically still passing, just don't make an F. I'm sure all of the "D" students I knew from high school are doing awesome in life.

When I think about the friends that I have and that I'm closest with and trust, there's no real common factors minus they have never really screwed me over. Sure we all have our selfish moments in life, but the genuine people care enough to explain their stance on a situation to seek understanding. Women struggle with this. Please let me know the last time you heard a woman admit she was wrong and that a guy was right. They may say it in a sly way, but they simply can't say the words. And if you're a woman, have you said these words, ever? Why can't you just admit that guys are sometimes right?

I don't think I'm perfect, but I will admit if I've done something adverse to someone inadvertently.  I have a best friend that I do not get along with, at all. You would honestly think we hated each other. Our other friends have often said to us, "Man, I don't see how y'all are friends". Were hard on each other and have almost come to blows on several occasions, but there are not many people I trust as much as him and its hard to think of anyone I trust more. For a guy, that's all it really takes. As guys, we can battle day in and day out with someone, but the second a separate battle ensues a real friend puts bullshit aside and becomes my banner-man.We have an instinct to bond and create an army of "boys" and everyone is not allowed in the battalion. That's why we build relationships. To battle, to hunt (women) and to trust.
http://images.wikia.com/pendragonadventure/images/c/c9/Cavemen-food-nutrition-1.jpg
To have a relationship with someone is to allow that person the opportunity to disappoint. Only someone I care about can actually let me down. This makes them high risk, high reward.  Why would you give the opportunity to be hurt? I have no clue why women involve themselves in relationships other than the matriarchal desire to nurture and take care of other life. Maybe that's why they love puppies or dudes who are beyond messed up in the head. Simply a "helpless" creature that they can care for. Hell if I know.  Women are quite often irrational, and when you try to explain things to them rationally, you're seen as speaking condescending or talking at them rather than to them.  I've yet to encounter a woman who can give me the same reasoning for the same behavior twice. Women make little sense to dudes, and they honestly make little sense to themselves. Just my opinion.

Monday, September 23, 2013

my "jack daniels induced dream" notes

If you hear the words “Cash Money Records taking over for the 9-9 and the 2000….” run to the dance floor.

An idea for Tyler Perry’s next movie. via my Jack Daniels induced dream over the weekend:  The tentative title: “Why Did I Get Married….I Love Deez Hoes”. Starring Trey Songz as Russell Rusthaven.
 
Russell is a high powered attorney, with a beautiful wife (played by Paula Patton) and three light skinned babies. He’s upwardly mobile, and accepted by white people everywhere. While at the company office party, in walks Tenisha (played by Lauren London), cleaning tables. She flirts with him, they start dating, and he eventually has her on the side. His new smangpiece. Giving her money, buying her a place, getting her a job, taking care of her kids….until the wife finds out. Lightskin on lightskin conflict ensues. Meanwhile, Tenisha leaves him for Idris Elba. Russell goes to the one place he’ll receive direction….his momma’s house. Enter Madea. HELLUR!....between Madea and church (it ain’t a Tyler Perry movie if church isn’t involved), he realizes he needs his family, only it’s too late. Idris Elba has started dating his ex-wife, and still keeps Tenisha on the side. Russell sees Elba at the barbershop and asks: “Why did I get married, I love deez hoes?” and Elba says “that’s nice and all, but do you have more hoes than me?” The end.



For this movie to be deemed successful, it was decided the role for Paula Patton be given to Gabrielle Union. Actress from such classics as Breaking All the Rules, Deliver Us From Eva, and the forever classic Something the Lord Made. Black women seem to love Dwyane Wade’s main babypusher. This was made evident by Being Mary Jane...someone is going to get abused, cheated on, or generally done dirty, Gabrielle Union needs to play that role. This will eventually lead to her destiny of straight to DVD movies sponsored by Sportin' Waves and Oodles N Noodles. 

Also, middle school taught me the acceptable answer for anyone getting on your nerves, telling you too much good news, or simply the time of day is: "....but do you got more hoes than me?" An acceptable rebuttal is to shake your head and repeat "YOU MAD" fiftyleven times. Thank you Cam'ron.

I'm giving a pass to all black people over 60 who add an "s" to any and everything. WalMarts. SunDrops. Golden Corrals. Family Feuds....you are forever forgiven.

All black people between the ages of 21-40 must take a pilgrimage to Charlotte during CIAA weekend and experience a phenomenon called "Getting on These Hoes."

Friday, September 20, 2013

Media Portrayals of Mental Illness...You noticed that too??

I'm sure that we have all heard the phrase "art mirrors society" or something to that affect.  It's true.  Many times, art and media put a magnifying glass on society and give people something they can relate to. And sometimes it doesn't mirror us back directly but is representative of a desire or fantasy and you get shows like True Blood and Walking Dead....There are an infinite amount of societal issues that the media touches on but I want to touch on one that I have noticed has become a theme in recent years.  I am talking about mental health/illness.  The media has done a poor job generally of depicting mental illness but recently has had a couple of redeeming elements in characters like House, Carrie Matheson in Homeland, and recently (spoiler alert) Cate Blanchette's character in Blue Jasmine.  House and Carrie Matheson are 2 characters who's mental illness gets redirected and is used as a strength.  In Blue Jasmine Woody Allen's anti-heroine systematically self destructs while struggling to accept what her life has become and we watch painfully as she eventually turns into a basketcase (Great flick).  I know a lot of people are thinking Walt Jr./Flynn from Breaking Bad but he has cerebral palsy which isnt a mental illness just a disorder that inhibits motor function but the portrayal of his character I find to be revolutionary in that he is a real smart ass in that show and most people think of the disabled as these, "woe is me" characters to be pitied.  Never pitied Flynn.  Wanted Skylar to slap the shit out of him but never pitied him. 

I think the reason why we are seeing more portrayal of mental illness is that there is more of it in our country than we want to admit.  Just look at the pharaceutical commercials on anti-depressants.  Theyre all over the place, and what about the portrayal of shrinks, psycologists and therapists (which are different btw).  The scene of the main character in a therapy session is almost cliche to the point of parody.  This to me is really unfortunate because mental illness is a serious problem and should be taken out of the realm of stigma.  People with issues with mental illness should seek help and realize that its just as important if not more as keeping physically fit and spiritually sound.  When you got a headache you take an aspirin if your arm breaks you get a cast so you can heal.  Your mind is no different.  There has been a recent influx of mass shootings occurring as a result of people who neglected their mental health. Its almost as if our ignorance of our fellow man's mental health is becoming a silent killer.  The recent Navy Yard tragedy is what inspired this article.  With Sandy Hook not to long ago and the movie theater shooting its becoming a serious problem.  Out of respect for the people affected by the tragedies I will decline to speak further about it but I charge all of you readers to make sure that they take care of yourselves.  Dont be afraid to ask for help and if your going through a rough patch try to stay positive and surround yourself with the right people.  Yeah I got sincere on y'all asses. Deal with it!

Monday, September 16, 2013

September Nerd Crush: Yukimi Nagano


The face and voice of a hipster standard, Little Dragon, Yukimi Nagano has made it to my monthly (as of today) list of nerds I'm crushing on. Little Dragon is essentially her nickname, earning on based on the fuming tantrums she used to throw (and maybe still throws) in the studio. I'd like to compare her voice to that of Erykah Badu, with a breathy slightly nasal sound clearly influenced by Jazz and soul standards. But where Erykah allows hip hop to be the icing on her cake, Nagano goes in a different direction, pulling from Alternative, Electronic, and what ever 2000 alt-pop has become. She's cute as shit, and her poetry truly divine. Listen to the how subtle the opening lines of "Twice" are. That simple lyric conjures a life time of unrequited love. She does more in a lyric then most of her contemporaries do in whole albums.

  

Hearts and Prayers...



We here at 5ivebruhs want to send out our prayers and thoughts to those affected by the tragedy at the U.S. Navy Yard today. Senseless violence needs to end America.
http://media.salemwebnetwork.com/cms/CCOM/5319-prayer_sunrise_630x313.630w.tn.jpg
With Love,
5ivebruhs

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

NFL Talk: NFC East Edition

I don't know why the hell Bob is talking about the NBA right now. That shit is not what's important right now. Sorry, its just not. It's football time baby! I wanted to give a recap of my perspective of opening weekend, but that post would have been too much typing. I'm not about that essay life. So instead, I condensed it to the division I know the most about. the NFC East. If you are a Cowboys, Eagles, Giants, or Redskins fan, this post is for you. (Notice I'm going to do this in alphabetical order as to hide any bias. I swear I'm gonna try to not show a ton of it. Can I promise none will shine through? Only way to find out is to keep on reading homie....)
http://epicmess.files.wordpress.com/2011/08/nfc-east-pic.jpg

Cowboys: One word. Stagnant. The Cowboys have been that team on the cusp every year, and it looks to be the same. They usually show up to every game and are there in the race for the NFC East every year until Romo cracks. If you look at Romo's numbers, its no question that he's an above average quarterback that can orchestrate an offense. But will he win games for you? No. If you put the game in his hands, which I feel like the Cowboys will and do each year, I don't think he can do it consistently. While their defense under Kiffin looks strong and caused six turnovers, let's not overlook that the Giants had a chance to win the game late. Demarco Murray looks dangerous at times, but with nothing deep in the passing game happening for the Cowboys, he's usually bottled up pretty quick. Terrance Williams dropped passes and that fear of him going deep was all but gone. Cowboys will be contenders again this year, but I think the fact that they didn't blow the Giants out shows lack of killer instinct. Without that, the 'Boys end up 7-9 (2-4 in NFC East; split games with the 'Skins; Philly takes both; Giants win the rematch) and miss the playoffs.
Must win game to change this: Week 14 at the Bears. Gonna be hard to beat the Bears in Chi-Town in the cold buddy, but if they do Week 17 is gonna be a showdown.

Eagles: Four words. Wow. Damn. Chip Kelly. That offense looked tough. If I didn't despise all of the radical ass 'Skins fans I would have felt bad. I only felt for my girlfriend because she looked pathetic in that Santana Moss jersey. The Eagles are for real. That offense is fast and that defense has always had speed. Trent Cole moving to OLB is paying dividends as its keeping the outside run game in check. Couple that with the other fast downhill play of their linebackers and running against the 'Birds ain't gonna be a picnic. I do think their defense backs are vulnerable which will become more evident as they move on to play Witten/Dez/Miles and Nicks/Cruz/Randle. Garcon/Moss/Hankerson showed some of that. Chip Kelly's offense is the reason he was brought in and Shady/Vick/Desean are the perfect fit. The only issue I see is coming late in the season when the legs of the players have run a shit ton of plays and fatigue. I do think having the last bye (week 12) will help them recover to finish the season decently enough. I hate to say it, but the Eagles win the NFC East at 10-6 (4-2 in NFC; split with the Giants because that's the nature of the rivalry; 'Skins win the rematch in week 11 before the Eagles bye week due to fatigue; take two from Dallas because that offense takes Ware out of the game.
The Toss Up: Week 17. Will they beat Dallas in Jerry's World on 16 week old legs? I mean I don't think Romo can win it for the 'boys. I'm guessing 23-20 Eagles, Henery can kick a damn football.

http://nfcbeast.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/NFC_Beast_Logo.jpg
Giants: Three words. Turnovers equal losses. The football gawds are not about to let you win with six turnovers even if your quarterback is a 4th quarter savant. Remember when Nicks and Cruz were both healthy during Cruz's breakout season two years ago? Remember how they were without question the strongest WR tandem in the league? I do. While I think its a toss up between Cruz/Nicks and Thomas/Welker, Jones/White in Atlanta is the best when healthy. I think Reuben Randle gives the Giants the slight edge when you go a little further on the WR depth chart (not counting TEs in Gonzalez). David Wilson is a flash in the pan at this point. You simply don't deserve money if you can't hold the ball and McGahee/Jacobs is not a long term solution. I think Wilson will get better though because that's Coughlin's nature. The defense looks surprisingly good. Tuck is healthy and the even with the injuries to the LBs and Stevie Brown, they played well. No huge TD plays (which has plagued the Giants) as they kept everything in front. Ryan Mundy will make or break this unit as will JPP's play coming off surgery. I feel the Giants can steal a wildcard spot. Seahawks get a wildcard and Giants/Bears get the other. Week 6 will determine that when they match up, but at Soldier Field it looks dim. Giants go 9-7 in part thanks to the week 9 bye week. (3-3 in NFC east; win Dallas rematch to finish a three game home-stand; split with Philly and 'Skins due to the nature of the rivalries).
Best case for the G-Men: Please see 2011 Giants season. But like I said, see them after Week 6. You just don't know which Giants team will show up each week.

Redskins: Two words. Let down. I swear I could hear Redskins stadium from my porch which is about 10 miles away. The 'Skins have the most radical fans in the league and they proved it when they booed their team off the field. Fact. RGIII looked every bit as rusty as was expected and in fact seemed a step slower. That's going to be the biggest let down. Without that same step, that offense isn't the threat it was a year ago. That step made Alfred Morris secondary in the option run game and caused the whole defense to cheat up. That's no longer the case. Morris is a hard nosed runner, but that's not going to work every play and the change-of-pace back (RGIII) isn't going to get it done with the knee. We also saw that he's not a pocket passer. The offense needs work. However, their defense will be a force this year. Orakpo/Kerrigan/Fletcher/Cofield make up a top 5 front seven in the league. I don't think the Eagles offense exposed the holes in the 'Skins D, but rather the effectiveness of Chip's quick offense. Once the offense was slowed down after the half they only put up 7 points, and I think that's due to the 'Skins play more than them intentionally protecting the lead. 'Skins go 6-10 (3-3 in NFC; they'll split with each team, it IS the NFC East) on the D's back and RGIII bouncing back a bit. I think the Week 5 bye will hurt them in the long run.
Their only hope: Week 6 in Dallas. I think they'll lose it, but if RGIII comes off the bye week rested with a few games under his belt to trust that knee, it could be an upset. From there they could gain confidence and momentum like last year but Weeks 11-17 are going to bury them.

There it is. My thoughts. I'm sure I'll get some hate from 'Skins fans as they return to their rightful place at the bottom of the NFC BEast. And you have no idea how hard it was to pick Philly to win it, but its the truth. God bless the NFL.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

So let’s take a trip down memory lane….NBA Edition. Top 40.


  • You remember Matt Maloney getting destroyed by John Stockton in the 97 WCF.
  • You’ve done the Dee Brown at least 50 times in your life.
  • You remember exactly where you were during game 6 of the 98 Finals.
  • You randomly quote “Practice? We talking about practice? Not the game, the actual game? We talking about practice? When you see me play, you see me give it everything I got. And we sittin’ here talking about practice? What are we talkin about man, practice?”
  • You realize Allen Iverson would never win a ring after that press conference, and remember were you were when you saw it.
  • At their peaks, you genuinely believe Barkley was better than Malone.
  • You have a special place of hate in your heart for Christian Laettner.
  • You understand Chris Mullin was the best at the backdoor screen.
  • You know NO TEAM is fucking with the Dream Team. And there is only one Dream Team.
  • You remember Richard Dumas looking like he could be the 2nd coming of Scottie Pippen, before the drugs.
  • You remember Chris Andersen AKA: BIRDMAN BIRDMAN © Shaq….getting 50 zillion dunk attempts in the 2005 Dunk Contest.
  • Kobe scored 81 pts.
  • Charlotteans….you went to the open scrimmage during the '99 NBA lookout which featured Master P and Brad Miller.
  • You know the best NBA fight will always be the Malace in the Palace.
  • Your Saturday wasn’t complete if you didn’t watch NBA Inside Stuff.
  • Ahmad Rashad will always be your “main man.”



  • Tim Hardaway is DA GAWD.
  • You legitimately thought Dennis Rodman would be dead by now.
  • You know Reggie Miller was the most overrated “star” player of his generation.
  • You know Mark Price was the most underrated guard of his generation.
  • You know NO TEAM is fucking with the 96 Bulls.
  • Oliver Miller is the fattest dude you’ve seen play in the NBA.
  • The phrase “two-piece” instantly brings images of Chris Childs and Kobe Bryant.
  • Before the knee injury, you know Penny Hardaway was poised to be top 50.
  • You still chuckle at Yinka Dare.
  • Without a doubt, the Honeybees had the finest cheerleaders of the 90’s.
  • The 1993 Knicks still make you miss the “no layup rule.”
  • You had B-Ball’s Best Kept Secret on cassette.
  • You thought Harold Miner, always touching the ball with his nose, had germs. 
  • You know the 2001 Clippers were a lightweight entertaining team.



  • You remember Shaq, on his birthday, destroying Keith Closs for 61 pts.
  • You know Dominique should have made the top 50, and should’ve won the ’88 Dunk Contest.
  • No matter what David Robinson does in his life, you know he’ll be remembered as getting destroyed by Olajuwon in the 95 Playoffs. And this is unfortunate because Robinson had a great career. 2x Champion. Even better life after basketball.
  • The Fab Five. ‘Nuff Said.
  • You know Scottie Pippen is criminally underrated. One of the five best defensive players of all time (Russell, Jordan, Payton, and Hakeem). The perfect 2nd banana.
  • You know if you were building a PF, you would want him to be Chris Webber. Perfect skills for a PF: post moves, jumper, ball handling skills, passing skills.
  • You know Vince Carter is the best dunker of all time.
  • You know Charles Barkley’s game 7 WCF against Seattle is his best game of all time.
  • You know the Kings were robbed in game 6 of the WCF against the Lakers in ’02.
  • Jordan is Teflon....and was 30 minutes from being a Knick after the ’97 Finals….damn. It still stings. 

Monday, September 9, 2013

Why Comics are important to us? As Told to Junot Diaz


Junot Diaz, certified genius and one of the greatest writers of our generation, recently had a signing of his new book This Is How I Lose Her at a Barnes and Noble in New York. During the signing some one posed a question on why comics are important. He then lays probably one of the most eloquent defense for the medium of comic books, and I would say nerd culture, that I've heard in a long time. Shot by DJ BenHaMeen, host of probably my favorite podcast to date Fanbros, this little grainy three minute video has made me feel more validated then a life time of BET Awards have never been able to accomplish. There's a second video on Akira and the power of Anime if you enjoyed the first at the fanbros website http://fanbros.com/junot-diaz/.


Thursday, September 5, 2013

Mixed Race People, Good For America? YES!

I find it funny that interacial couples are even still taboo today.  I remember earlier this year Brudda J had a post talking about the Cheerios commercial that featured an interracial couple and their child.  People went nuts over it Black people and White people alike.  I sometimes wonder what its like to to be Asian, Hispanic or "other" and  watch the Black people and White people complain about shit everyday.  Anyway obviously race is still a very sensitive subject.  Black peoples ears perk up if they hear the word "black" (in any context) uttered from a southern accent.  Black people and White people still at times feel some type of way when they see couples of different races walking together.  Well, usually its Black women that shoot that dirty look to a Black man and a White woman together.  A Black man will give the proverbial "head nod of approval" when their girl aint looking.  Funny how it works right?  Sometimes I feel like at the end of the day we just want something to complain about but this post is not about interracial dating.  We have covered that a couple times before. This post touches on what the more disapproving of interracial dating fear the most.  Mixed race children.

My mother being the product of an interracial relation gives me special but not full insight into this issue.  But I do remember the first major conflict I had when this subject was brought up.  I was talking to this girl and we had been friends for a long time but were kind of thinking about being mroe than that and she brought up interracial dating and how she thought it was wrong and an afront to the Black race.  I took major offense and told her that in some way I am a product of and interracial relationship and she said that I "didn't count" and continued to spew her ignorance.  Needless to say, that relationship didnt go anywhere.  I could write and incredible blog post about how that ended but I wouldn't want to embarass her.  Anyway, this isnt the first time I have heard this. I have friends who believe that it is their responsibility to their race to marry a black woman/man for the preservation of the Black American family.  What a crock of shit!  That is so ass backwards to me its laughable.  The funny thing is that interracial marriages and mixed race children represent a personification of the American Melting pot and the existence of more interracial people in our country will inevitably open up a brand new dialogue about race which can only bring about positive change.  This is really ironic because most of the people who claim interracial relationships mark the dissolution of Black culture also preach equality and social justice.  Are not interracial relationships one of the most symbolic public celebrations of that mentality?

Now this is not a ode to white women. Honestly I would prefer to date people of other cultures regardless of their skin color just because they carry with them new perspective and experiences which I find interesting.  I am not asking people to see my way of thinking but if you site personal responsibility to your race as a factor in choosing a mate you might think a bit too highly of yourself in general.  Just a thought.

Oh and mixed race women are hot as shit.  Thats a fact.  Why you think we Americans have this fantasy about Brazil? They're ALL mixed up over there and if we keep going the way were going in about 50 years our women can look like this----->



I'll leave you with that.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Three Annoying Types of People


In life, there are those who just don't get it. There are those who forgo common decency and respect and I don't get that. There are those who can admit their flaws and those who are ignorant to their own short comings. I'm far from perfect, but here are three types of people who are just really not hitting on any cylinders for me in the last week.

http://cdn.i-sight.com/uploads/rudeness.jpgRude People.
You encounter these people everyday in one way or another. Its the person who can't say good morning or thank you when you obviously gave them five seconds of your day, or your life, when you hold the door for them. Nothing is worse than being polite and they don't acknowledge it at all. At my job, there are two doors you have to go through to get into the building. The exterior and the second set to get in the lobby. Yesterday, I held the door for the guy about 15 steps behind me. As he walked through the first door, he said nothing. I didn't worry about it too much because he was about one second from redeeming himself. He did no such thing. Also, I'm annoyed with people at fast food restaurants who huff and puff about giving out extra sauce. Is it YOUR honey mustard? Did you harvest the mustard seeds and farm the honey yourself? If not, give me my damn sauce punk. I'm also annoyed with dudes in the men's room. If there are three stalls, two of which are occupied, don't take the last one if I'm trying to get a paper seat cover. If your nasty ass doesn't care to create a barrier between your cheeks and the previous man's cheeks that's on you. Please don't zoom past me to take the stall I was obviously eying. I hope you fall in or the last man had pubic lice.

Over Opinionated Folks.
I just want to take a moment for silence............... Death to close-mindedness. Look, I'm not saying you are not allowed your opinions, but just the opposite. You're allowed to think what you want, and the man next to you also has the same right. Your degree doesn't make you the authority on shit. Please don't try to inject me with your opinion thinking I'm going to see that opinion as the gospel. Chances are it will be rejected. There's nothing wrong with laying out your opinion and having intelligent debate, but go into the convo with the expectation that you will not reach an agreement. Go into the conversation with the mindset that you may have a chance to offer a different point of view. The fact that someone felt the need to curse me out and de-friend me on Facebook over that Macklemore post that I only shared as a writer on this blog is absolutely mind-numbing. If you feel some way about Syria, Miley, abortion, Macklemore or whatever it may be, I will entertain a conversation. But if you feel like your passion about the subject is uncontrollable, shut up. You will only frustrate yourself and sound ignorant/close-minded. I remember the Chick-Fil-A controversy. Just because I'm not your banner man waving signs for your cause in front of stores, doesn't mean I'm against you. It just means the conviction in me is not strong enough to follow in the manner you like. I'm not about to fake some passion I don't have. To me, that's more insulting. I can support YOU without supporting your cause directly. That's the best I can do, I'm sorry.

Racists.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-RpgCBYVVeK0/Uf_ZxWS3QDI/AAAAAAAABVo/ALEo5GuGBSc/s320/Racist,+Black+and+White.jpgI've never been a fan of racist people, but I do have a certain respect for those who are just outwardly racist. I'm not about to like the KKK fan page, but I can respect that I at least know where you stand. Its the new age racist that I can't stand. Those people who think my opinions on race are out dated and pretend white privilege is a thing of the past. I'm speaking mainly to non-black people attempting to tell me to essentially "get over it". Its not about to happen. I have no idea what its like to be Chinese, Mexican, African etc. I've never lived that life. I don't know the idiosyncrasies that come with being something I'm not. For a white person to tell me I'm racist for defending my culture is just ignorant. I'm allowed to stick up for those I purposely or inadvertently represent. If you think you can down talk black people in front of me or use the word 'ghetto' in a derogatory manner in reference to things that are 'black' you're mistaken. Look up the definition of ghetto, and not in urban dictionary, fool. There are 133 definitions of the word there. Please find a synonym to help yourself. Notice none of them denote anything about race. Bitch, your dusty ass car, holey granny panties and broken hair dryer isn't ghetto. Unless used in proper context, including the historical significance to the Jewish people, just avoid it. Also, reverse racism isn't racism of blacks on whites specifically or exclusively. White people do not own racism. That idea itself is racist. Reverse racism is preferential treatment to minorities over a majority for no other reason than because they are the majority. The Trayvon Martin case is NOT reverse racism people.

I'm done griping. The love is still there. Enjoy your day.

Monday, September 2, 2013

Black Superhereos: Who is going to get Star Treatment?

Luke Cage 
 

Luke Cage is a walking Blaxploitation stereotype. A former Harlem gang banger until he's sent to prison and experiment on for the same super solider program that created most of Marvel's superheroes. Unlike most he becomes a mercenary and bounty hunter,  deals with a drug problem, and has a white girl friend. With Avengers 2 on the horizon, and a desire for an increased roster that is not quite as white washed as the original movie, Luke Cage is a bit of a shoe in. He's been around since the 70s, and has been in every incarnation of the Avengers since the 90s. Rumors have it Tyrese and the Rock want the part, along with Terry Crews. Interesting to see how he will fit since he's essentially Captian America, minus the shield and the blond hair.

Black Panther 

In his myth, the Black Panther is a title give to the chief of a tribe in a fictional African Nation. Powered by a connection to a mythical panther god (I wish I was making this up) Black Panther is imbued with super natural abilities and senses along with a arsenal of magical (yep magical) artifacts from his status as King of Africa (yep the continent). Black Panther has been sitting in Hollywood purgatory since the early 90s. There have been references made in various other Marvel Phase One projects like Iron Man and currently documentary film maker Mark Bailey is working on a script. Marvel has essentially exhausted its main proprieties, and even pushed lesser known superhereos in to natural spot light. With casting rumors already in the work chances are high that we will see this slightly stereotypical superhero soon. Chadwick Boseman (42) is rumored though I can also see Ato Essandoh (Django, Chopper, Get Him to the Greek), and Chiwetel Ejiofor (12 Years a Slave)  getting a few looks.

Spawn 

Yes I know Spawn already had a big screen adaptation that though terrible, was still influential on our current superhero movie fascination. Spawn is a black mercenary who after being horribly killed is transported to hell to become one of Satan's incarnation's solder for the upcoming Apocalypse. Yeah, a family summer popcorn fest. Issue facing a reboot of Spawn is its unkid-friendly nature. Hollywood is slow to greenlight R rated superhero movies because they don't sell as well as their PG-13 counter part. Similar characters Deadpool, Venom, and a R rated Daredevil remake are all bearily treading water. A horror reboot is being shopped with Jamie Foxx rumored as wanting to play the lead. The twist is Spawn's creator is pushing for a low budget take on the character rather then a CGI rich sci-fest as a way to try to push the character through.

Falcon 

I think Falcon is lame. Similar to Luke Cage, Falcon was a Harlem kid who really like birds till his mother was killed and racist cops refused to track down her killer. Jaded he moves to L.A and becomes a gang banger and a pimp (as you do.) As a pimp he crashes on an Island full of superheros and meets a red tail hawk (umm yeah.) Anyway crazy super-villain uses something called the Cosmic Cube and fuses Falcon to his hawk creating some kind of link. Falcon meets Captain America, they become friends and Falcon becomes the first black superhero, and the first brother who battled being called a token. He can fly and talk to his hawk with his mind, and...that's about it. Falcon is apparently going to be in the upcoming Captain America sequel played by Anthony Mackie, which may mean he is will also be in Avengers 2.