Now if you dont smoke (scratch that, many of you probably have jobs with rules which vehemently prohibit such activities) if you have NEVER smoked weed...first of all im sorry for you because as you have read (for you dedicated 5ivebruhs fans) I, Jonny Casanova, have broken down all the perks of indulging in the beautiful soul flower in the post "Its from the Earth". But I digress. For those of you who do, or are open to the idea, I must say one of my favorite things to do besides sloppily "murdalizing" a footlong sub with EVERYTHING on it, is listen to music. For some reason I can hear it better or something. I dont know, but its a glorious experience. So, I want to share this with you all. I will drop some songs that sound extremely better when ur a little lifted. Don't judge just take my advice...if you try this and don't find yourself chilling on cloud 11 then...uhhh...i dont know just try it, its fun...So without further adieu here you go...Your Welcome.
*Sidenote* All of these are also very creative interpretations of each song and do things with film that are pretty cool....so if your into that,youll also find enjoyment in that aside from you being under the influence.
so apparently the band Portishead is not allowing you to embed ANY of their videos...BUT this song and video is worth redirecting to YouTube for about 5 minutes and watching it. This song is definitely one of my favorite all time. So heres the link...sorry about that folks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z09-Qtbpork
Different guys. Different thoughts.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
My New Year's Resolutions
As 2009 comes to a close and we look forward to 2010 with great interest it’s time to begin that great clichéd tradition: Resolutions. I understand the point and the reason of making a resolution as the new year is supposed to represent the start of a new phase in a person’s life and they get to start with a clean slate. I usually avoid making New Year’s resolutions as either I make them far too ambitious and I can never achieve them or I simply forget what I had resolved to do or not do. Never one to be deterred I have decided to give this whole resolution deal another shot and list out what my goals are for the year and just how likely they are to happen.
Get in better shape: Yes, Yes I know this is a very common one and everyone will have it on their list but damn it it’s important. Although I am by no means fat or even in bad shape it never hurts to hit the gym and improve one’s physical conditioning. Besides looking better I will feel better overall and most importantly it gives me an excuse to get out of the house a couple times a week. I am not looking to run a marathon or toss beer kegs over my head in strong men competitions, just good overall condition.
Chances of this happening: 90% as I have already been exercising consistently over the past two months, so it’s just a matter of keeping up with it.
Be more of a realist: Over my lifetime I have either been very optimistic or somewhat pessimistic, and both of which can lead to lead to great unhappiness. Although being an optimist is generally a good thing, it can become quite depressing when everything you were optimistic about turns to shit. On the other hand being a pessimist prepares you for any disappointment you may encounter but life is not very fun when all you expect is for things not to go well. I suppose the best course of action would be to temper my optimism and realize that in many situations things will not work out as I hoped. Most importantly I need to plan for all scenarios so I can be prepared if things do not go as I hoped.
Chances of this happening: Realistically speaking 50% but I am hoping for an 87% chance.
Be a better friend: This is one that I am especially embarrassed about. Simply put I feel that at times I am not as good of a friend as I could be. Things such as missed calls and taking too long to return calls really make me feel as though I am not being the sort of friend I would like to be. It’s not that I do not value my friends; it’s just that I am not good in staying in contact with them. To address this issue I am going to set a goal of contacting or calling one of my friends at least once a week. It may not sound like much but it will definitely be a big improvement over what I manage now.
Chances of this happening: 80%
Finish more of the games in my collection: At moment present I have about 90 games in my collection and I have only finished around two-thirds of them. Despite loving videogames I am simply not very good at them, and I also have a tendency to reach the halfway point and never complete them. To make matters worse instead of going back and beating those games, I often replay ones that I have already finished. Fortunately I have a lot of free time on my hands these days so I really have no excuse not to play through these games. Unfortunately this resolution will not get off to a great start, as soon after the New Year a game which I have been greatly anticipating comes out and I will surely buy it and play it immediately, shunning the rest of my collection.
Chances of this happening: 55%
Watching more movies: I consider myself a movie lover but, actually I cannot support these claims as the list of films I have watched is woefully small. Another issue is that I rarely venture out to the movie theater and view new films. I blame this one on my ADD as I simply cannot stay focused in a movie theater for the duration of the film, and in general I just don’t really care for the movie theater as much as most people. Also much like my process of playing video games I tend to watch the same movie, over and over and over again constantly. Given this I want to rent at least one new movie a month and go to the theater at least once a season.
Chances of this happening: 25% given that I am watching Star Wars for the 89050th time as I type this.
Read more often: If there is one thing I am upset about with the educational system is how they manage to take the fun out of tasks I used to enjoy. I used to love reading when I was growing up, I would read a book every other week in the summer at my peak. Now I simply don’t have the attention span to read books anymore, unless they have racecars in them or on the cover. I want to get back to my old ways by reading a new book every month. Also note I want to read fun books, sure having War and Peace on your nightstand might look impressive but I know there is no way I am going to read it. Given this I plan to start with a book called Hard Driving which is a book about the first black NASCAR driver Wendell Scott.
Chances of this happening: 68%
Well that’s it for my goals in 2010. It looks like I have my work cut out for me this year so I will keep you all posted occasionally to see how it is coming along.
Now tell me: What are your New Year's Resolutions?
Sunday, December 27, 2009
whuppin's
today's topic: whuppin's
i'm typin this macgyver style. all i need is internet & a snickers.......the worst whuppin i've ever received came courtesy of carman.
creep with me © snoop
the summer of '93.
age: 6.
the crime: too much lip
before i start this story, if you received whuppin's growing up you’ll understand the difference between your mom's beatin' and your pop's beatin'...mothers: more emotion, temporary blackout, a little guilt afterwards. fathers: less emotion, get-in get-out, don't back talk.
my mother's college roommate lived in greensboro. close friend of the family. i call her my aunt. we were in some mall in greensboro. in the mall area outside of dillards, vendors were selling basketball cards....i was big on basketball cards as a youngin’. my collection was the envy of most of my peers, aside from regis james. he had more michael jordan cards than i....but i digress, i'm buggin’ my mother for some basketball cards. she turned to me, in a harriette winslow voice, and stated "you have enough cards, more cards than you need.....we are going shopping for your sister today. sit in the chair, don't get up, and be quiet."
i sit in the chair.
10 minutes.
30 minutes.
45 minutes.
after an hour of sitting, i thought my reward should be some basketball cards. especially a charles barkley card. he was mvp that year, and he was one of my favorite players...the other two being david robinson, and scottie pippen.
we're driving in the car, in the parking lot of the mall. i popped in carman’s cassette tape…listening to addicted 2 jesus by carman ft. dc talk...........i decided to voice my displeasure with her decision making. she said, "i'm the parent, you are the child. i told you we were shopping for your sister. if you say something else, you're getting a spanking." .....me being the youngin’ i was, i decided to be a smartass....i said "something else"
she parked the car.
got a switch......for the laymen, a "switch" is a skinny tree branch used to spank bad ass chaps.
and proceeded to beat me in the parking lot of the mall, as addicted 2 jesus played in the background.....to this day, when i hear that song, i think about that whuppin'.
hopefully one day, i'll beat my kids and they'll have stories to tell.
happy new year to all the readers of 5ivebruhs.....adios muchachos
Friday, December 25, 2009
Happy Kwanzaa
Tomorrow is the First day of Kwanzaa. So in a effort to be a little different, I would like to wish everyone a very happy Kwanzaa. Tomorrow will be a celebration of Umoja, or Unity. We live in a very turbulent time in history. Unfortunately in this post-racial America, we are still dividing ourselves on cultural, political, economical, and racial boundaries. We have a desperate need to unify on a common goal and dream. The American dream does not have to be a passing fantasy, or a lie we tell our children like that of Santa Claus. We can, and shall unified on the common goal of freedom and equal rights for all. Where everyone has the responsibility and opportunity to make the most of this life granted to us. So as we slide toward the new year America, remember the ideal of Umoja. Unity on a common ground.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Merry Christmas Eve!
I've been on the road all day 5ivebruhs fam so sorry this is a lil late. But i only have two things to talk about right now. One of these things pisses me the hell off and the other makes have a sinister smile inside everytime. (Sorry this is about to be a lil half-assed but you will get the point)
The thing I hate? Mufuckin traffic. I honestly believe there are three or four mufuckers in foreign import vehicles who drive onto the highway and take up all the lanes. They then slow down to about 6 miles per hour and make the ppl behind them stop, and once they have a long enough line of saps, they take the fuck off. Why do I say this? Doesn't it always seem like when you get to the end of the traffic AINT SHIT THERE?! Like why the hell was everyone driving so slow? It's those three or four mufucks I was talking about earlier. I wanna let Mike Tyson anally masacre them.
And the thing that makes me smile inside everytime with a slight bit of evil? Saying "Merry Christmas" to EVERYONE. Forget that PC bullshit. I say it to Hindus, Buddhists, Jews, Atheists, Africans in Dashikis and Bums. I don't care about what you celebrate cuz im all about that Christmas nigga. Saying "Happy Holidays" is for suckers who care about every damn body. If you like Christmas, I like you. And if you celebrate something else not gonna say I don't like you, but Christmas is where it's at. Cookies and milk son! Well time to get back to the family!
MUCH LOVE!
L'Chaim (for my Jews)...... P!ed P!per
The thing I hate? Mufuckin traffic. I honestly believe there are three or four mufuckers in foreign import vehicles who drive onto the highway and take up all the lanes. They then slow down to about 6 miles per hour and make the ppl behind them stop, and once they have a long enough line of saps, they take the fuck off. Why do I say this? Doesn't it always seem like when you get to the end of the traffic AINT SHIT THERE?! Like why the hell was everyone driving so slow? It's those three or four mufucks I was talking about earlier. I wanna let Mike Tyson anally masacre them.
And the thing that makes me smile inside everytime with a slight bit of evil? Saying "Merry Christmas" to EVERYONE. Forget that PC bullshit. I say it to Hindus, Buddhists, Jews, Atheists, Africans in Dashikis and Bums. I don't care about what you celebrate cuz im all about that Christmas nigga. Saying "Happy Holidays" is for suckers who care about every damn body. If you like Christmas, I like you. And if you celebrate something else not gonna say I don't like you, but Christmas is where it's at. Cookies and milk son! Well time to get back to the family!
MERRY CHRISTMAS NIGGETS!!!!!
MUCH LOVE!
L'Chaim (for my Jews)...... P!ed P!per
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
The ONLY Black Guy
For my black male 5ivebruhs readers, you probably know the direction I’m taking with this. Being the only black dude unfortunately can be a stressful and annoying situation for a number of reasons. I am here to break down a couple of reasons why being the only black dude in certain situations can wear on you over time. Its inevitable, however, that you as a black male will have to face this situation. Being the only black dude is very common in the collegiate and professional world. You gotta face it sometime. Although most of my my experiences as the only black dude have been favorable overall its those little uncomfortable moments that seem to threaten to ruin it.
One good reason why being the only black dude gets annoying over time is for the comradery you feel sometimes from having someone there that you feel like may have grown up similarly to you. Just like on the first day of school in college when I THOUGHT I was gonna be the only black dude in class then…guess who walked in… The P!ed P!per himself. I thought to myself. “HELL YEAH!! This niggas gonna be my dude” There was an empty chair beside me and I knew he was gonna sit there and we would forge a friendship from that moment on. NOPE!!! That nigga went and sat beside 2 white girls. I thought “Fucking Sellout”. That was the wrong thing to think and that move was probably all apart of HIS strategy not to pigeon hole himself which I was shamelessly willing to do. Plus he didn’t really like me I found out later. Somehow we became the best of friends but that story’s much too long to tell.
Another reason why being the only black dude sucks is that there is always one asshole who feels like it needs to be pointed out that there is a black man in the room. As if no one recognized that shit when I walked into the room at the party. This guy or girl is probably trying to assess your “blackness” to see what kind of statements they can get away with before you snap. They will say things like. “Yeah that guys not really black, he’s like that Obama black” or “SOMEBODY went to college, where’d YOU learn to speak like that??”. The mature way to combat this is to ignore the ignorant or point out there ignorance in a classy way therefore not playing into the stereo types they’ve predetermined and being the bigger person. If you’re like me though, you’ll point out some fucked up shit about them that they’re probably insecure about and go HARD on there ass!! That’s the funniest and most rewarding way to handle it to me (at least in college/at parties… wouldn’t wanna lose your job making fun of people in the office…)
In short all black men have to deal with this either in the work place or social situations. It’s just an annoying fact of life. I know at least all the 5ivebruhs members have dealt with it. You can either find away to make it work or completely alienate yourself from your peers. It’s really up to you.
<--this guy know WTF Im talking about....trust me
Happy Holidays and if you find yourself the only black dude at a Christmas party and someone tries to get stupid…don’t hesitate to forsake the Christmas spirit and get in that ASS!
One good reason why being the only black dude gets annoying over time is for the comradery you feel sometimes from having someone there that you feel like may have grown up similarly to you. Just like on the first day of school in college when I THOUGHT I was gonna be the only black dude in class then…guess who walked in… The P!ed P!per himself. I thought to myself. “HELL YEAH!! This niggas gonna be my dude” There was an empty chair beside me and I knew he was gonna sit there and we would forge a friendship from that moment on. NOPE!!! That nigga went and sat beside 2 white girls. I thought “Fucking Sellout”. That was the wrong thing to think and that move was probably all apart of HIS strategy not to pigeon hole himself which I was shamelessly willing to do. Plus he didn’t really like me I found out later. Somehow we became the best of friends but that story’s much too long to tell.
Another reason why being the only black dude sucks is that there is always one asshole who feels like it needs to be pointed out that there is a black man in the room. As if no one recognized that shit when I walked into the room at the party. This guy or girl is probably trying to assess your “blackness” to see what kind of statements they can get away with before you snap. They will say things like. “Yeah that guys not really black, he’s like that Obama black” or “SOMEBODY went to college, where’d YOU learn to speak like that??”. The mature way to combat this is to ignore the ignorant or point out there ignorance in a classy way therefore not playing into the stereo types they’ve predetermined and being the bigger person. If you’re like me though, you’ll point out some fucked up shit about them that they’re probably insecure about and go HARD on there ass!! That’s the funniest and most rewarding way to handle it to me (at least in college/at parties… wouldn’t wanna lose your job making fun of people in the office…)
In short all black men have to deal with this either in the work place or social situations. It’s just an annoying fact of life. I know at least all the 5ivebruhs members have dealt with it. You can either find away to make it work or completely alienate yourself from your peers. It’s really up to you.
<--this guy know WTF Im talking about....trust me
Happy Holidays and if you find yourself the only black dude at a Christmas party and someone tries to get stupid…don’t hesitate to forsake the Christmas spirit and get in that ASS!
Monday, December 21, 2009
A Real Hero
As we swiftly approach the holidays and look under our trees with great interest I want to share a very uplifting and inspiring story I stumbled upon.
Aaron Fotheringham is clearly the type of person who simply won’t take no for an answer or settle for the status quo. He was born with a birth defect in his spinal cord, which has stricken him to a wheelchair. Despite this handicap he has been determined to pursue his passion for BMX and ‘extreme’ sports in general. Clearly given his physical handicap riding a bicycle was out of the question so he was able to create his own sport using his wheelchair. Attempting the same sorts of tricks and maneuvers you may see on the X-Games, Aaron has made a name for himself as a pioneer in “Hardcore Sitting”. In 2006 he achieved a milestone by pulling off the first back flip in a wheelchair and ever since then he has received world wide recognition.
Simply put the kid is impressive. I am simply amazed by the determination and bravery it takes to do what Aaron has accomplished. What makes his story even better is the effort he has made to be a great role model. During the summer and Aaron attends camps for disabled children to serve as a coach and encourage them to follow their dreams just as he has. Check the video below and watch Aaron in action, I am sure you will be as impressed as I am.
I hope you enjoyed this story and that it may inspire you to do something amazing. Happy Holidays and thanks for reading!
Sunday, December 20, 2009
asshole
today's topic: assholes
as we close 2009, it has been a year of highs and lows in pop culture. the lows have been courtesy of a few special assholes. some should be slapped, some imprisoned, and some stoned. without further ado, i present to you the top 10 assholes of 2009. (in order)... but first: bob george's man of the year.
man of the year: capt. chesley "sully" sullenberger - i will never get tired of seeing or hearing his story in the media. as a frequent flyer, i can only imagine how frightening an experience it must have been for the people on 1549. he saved 155 lives....that is way more important than a wannabe reality show celebrity, a kardashian story, or any other media generated scandal the pop culture machine has to offer. capt. sully represents the best in the human spirit and is a true hero.
now.... on to the foolishness.
10. adam lambert - somebody please wake me up when his 15 minutes of fame is done. why is he famous for being gay? what the hell? at the american music awards, he tongue kissed a dude. televisions all over the country changed the channel. people sending in letters writing complaints. the FCC hadn't had this much of a problem since janet jackson's titty said hello... adam lambert needs an ass whuppin’. not for being gay, but for forcing that shit during his performance. his performance was ass. he started doing overtly sexual antics, to make up for his lack of performing skills.
9. lil’ mama - why in the fuckety fuck was she on stage with jay-z? i can't name one lil’ mama record other than "my lip gloss is poppin"....jay-z and alicia keys are in the middle of a good show, when lil mama ignores beyonce's wish and goes on stage to represent for the idiots in the music industry. she thought it would be "all love", "acceptable", "a good look for NY" if she was on stage...she was wrong. she became a parody in the process and ruined what was left of her lil’ career.
8. shaq - we saw two sides of the "playa" spectrum among professional athletes in 2009. shaq, a real playa, got caught sleeping with gilbert arenas fiancée. shaq already has a wife and five kids. i do not condone cheating on your spouse. however, if you do cheat, go all out like shaq. he's scoring on both sides. although this wasn't the first time he's cheated, this was the last straw for shaunie o'neal...she took the kids and moved to LA. she's filing for divorce....go be with your family shaq, ho's come and go.
7. tiger woods - the other side of the game was tiger woods. i can honestly say, tiger woods is not a playa. once again, i do not condone cheating on your spouse. however, if you are worth over a billion dollars and you only fuck 14 girls in 5 years, that's just sad. he probably loved all of his bitches, with all his heart...he's an asshole for failing to properly cheat. you don't fuck perkins waitresses and various other bustdown bitches, you fuck hollywood bitches because they know the code....when you are famous, and you have sex with women who have nothing to lose and everything to gain from putting your business in the streets, you will always lose....tiger, stick to playing golf and ask shaq to let you borrow some bitches.
6. joe wilson - president obama is making a speech on television. senator joe wilson of sc interrupts the speech, and says "you lie" in response to obama stating health reform would not insure illegal immigrants....first off all, who the fuck is joe wilson to challenge anything president obama has to say? secondly, it's outright disrespect to interrupt the president while he's addressing the nation. he needs his ass whupped for that...although i thought it was funny, i didn't like it last year when the iraqi journalist threw a shoe at w. bush...its disrespect. regardless of how you feel about their policies or personalities, if you live in the usa, he's your president. have some respect, bitch.
5. the balloon boy - i'm at work. earning my pay check. being a diligent corporate employee. my co-workers tell me to go to cnn.com and read this unbelievable bullshit story. there is a 6 yr. old named falcon henne stuck in a hot air balloon in colorado....i instantly thought, white person....then i knew this story was false when i saw how the balloon was turning. it would easily toss that little fucker out....sure enough, while on live tv little falcon states the family did this for "a show"....another publicity stunt by a wannabe celebrity in america.
4. kanye west - he needs a taylor swift kick in the ass. granted, she is more famous after the incident, but still....his punkass knows better. his drunk ass crashed the stage and blathered some dumb shit about beyonce's video being one of the best off all time. he looked like a fool © ife....crop circles and all....he's laying low now, which is the right thing to do because he lost a lot of cool points by acting like an asshole. that night was supposed to be about michael jackson. instead, on the cover of every major publication the next day, his drunk ass is on stage grabbing the microphone from a little white girl. your publicity seeking ass got what you wanted. now, make your music and shut the fuck up.
3. tareq and michaele salahi - they need a secret service ass whuppin...how the fuck you sneak into a dinner at the white house, take pictures with the president, and then post the photos on facebook. i'm tired of all these wanna be celebrities in america actin' an ass. enough is a fuckin 'nuff....how did they get through clearance? where's the security? where are the necessary arrests that need to be made? this isn't some random college party you crashed. this is the leader of the nation, the most powerful man alive. you crash his party and nobody goes to jail? nobody gets fired? SOMEBODY got to go to jail...it's that simple. they need to be stoned for puttin the security of barack obama in danger.
2. chris brown - i didn't know chris brown had it in him...his name now is synonymous with woman beating. he received his punishment through court, and every chance he gets, he apologizes to rihanna. we get the point nigga...although i don't like how she decided to talk about the situation when she started promoting her album, i'll let it slide. only because he shouldn't have hit her...according to tmz, she hit him first in the car and he snapped. he then hit her as he drove. if a woman hits you, just leave her and don't put yourself in a situation to catch a case.....tmz is efficient. i'm keeping my dirt on the low. tmz will find you out
1. conrad murray - this nigga here....when you kill michael jackson, you are public enemy #1. i hope he gets a prison sentence, and gets anally assaulted for every day of his sentence. he gave michael jackson an excess of propofol. that shit doesn't even sound helpful...and, the muthafucka didn't call the cops for 45 minutes after he found out jackson was unconscious. murray's going to jail.... how the fuck you kill michael jackson? i still can't believe he's dead.
merry christmas to everyone who reads our blog. i love you all.....bitches.
as we close 2009, it has been a year of highs and lows in pop culture. the lows have been courtesy of a few special assholes. some should be slapped, some imprisoned, and some stoned. without further ado, i present to you the top 10 assholes of 2009. (in order)... but first: bob george's man of the year.
man of the year: capt. chesley "sully" sullenberger - i will never get tired of seeing or hearing his story in the media. as a frequent flyer, i can only imagine how frightening an experience it must have been for the people on 1549. he saved 155 lives....that is way more important than a wannabe reality show celebrity, a kardashian story, or any other media generated scandal the pop culture machine has to offer. capt. sully represents the best in the human spirit and is a true hero.now.... on to the foolishness.
10. adam lambert - somebody please wake me up when his 15 minutes of fame is done. why is he famous for being gay? what the hell? at the american music awards, he tongue kissed a dude. televisions all over the country changed the channel. people sending in letters writing complaints. the FCC hadn't had this much of a problem since janet jackson's titty said hello... adam lambert needs an ass whuppin’. not for being gay, but for forcing that shit during his performance. his performance was ass. he started doing overtly sexual antics, to make up for his lack of performing skills.
9. lil’ mama - why in the fuckety fuck was she on stage with jay-z? i can't name one lil’ mama record other than "my lip gloss is poppin"....jay-z and alicia keys are in the middle of a good show, when lil mama ignores beyonce's wish and goes on stage to represent for the idiots in the music industry. she thought it would be "all love", "acceptable", "a good look for NY" if she was on stage...she was wrong. she became a parody in the process and ruined what was left of her lil’ career.
8. shaq - we saw two sides of the "playa" spectrum among professional athletes in 2009. shaq, a real playa, got caught sleeping with gilbert arenas fiancée. shaq already has a wife and five kids. i do not condone cheating on your spouse. however, if you do cheat, go all out like shaq. he's scoring on both sides. although this wasn't the first time he's cheated, this was the last straw for shaunie o'neal...she took the kids and moved to LA. she's filing for divorce....go be with your family shaq, ho's come and go.
7. tiger woods - the other side of the game was tiger woods. i can honestly say, tiger woods is not a playa. once again, i do not condone cheating on your spouse. however, if you are worth over a billion dollars and you only fuck 14 girls in 5 years, that's just sad. he probably loved all of his bitches, with all his heart...he's an asshole for failing to properly cheat. you don't fuck perkins waitresses and various other bustdown bitches, you fuck hollywood bitches because they know the code....when you are famous, and you have sex with women who have nothing to lose and everything to gain from putting your business in the streets, you will always lose....tiger, stick to playing golf and ask shaq to let you borrow some bitches. 
6. joe wilson - president obama is making a speech on television. senator joe wilson of sc interrupts the speech, and says "you lie" in response to obama stating health reform would not insure illegal immigrants....first off all, who the fuck is joe wilson to challenge anything president obama has to say? secondly, it's outright disrespect to interrupt the president while he's addressing the nation. he needs his ass whupped for that...although i thought it was funny, i didn't like it last year when the iraqi journalist threw a shoe at w. bush...its disrespect. regardless of how you feel about their policies or personalities, if you live in the usa, he's your president. have some respect, bitch.5. the balloon boy - i'm at work. earning my pay check. being a diligent corporate employee. my co-workers tell me to go to cnn.com and read this unbelievable bullshit story. there is a 6 yr. old named falcon henne stuck in a hot air balloon in colorado....i instantly thought, white person....then i knew this story was false when i saw how the balloon was turning. it would easily toss that little fucker out....sure enough, while on live tv little falcon states the family did this for "a show"....another publicity stunt by a wannabe celebrity in america. 
4. kanye west - he needs a taylor swift kick in the ass. granted, she is more famous after the incident, but still....his punkass knows better. his drunk ass crashed the stage and blathered some dumb shit about beyonce's video being one of the best off all time. he looked like a fool © ife....crop circles and all....he's laying low now, which is the right thing to do because he lost a lot of cool points by acting like an asshole. that night was supposed to be about michael jackson. instead, on the cover of every major publication the next day, his drunk ass is on stage grabbing the microphone from a little white girl. your publicity seeking ass got what you wanted. now, make your music and shut the fuck up. 
3. tareq and michaele salahi - they need a secret service ass whuppin...how the fuck you sneak into a dinner at the white house, take pictures with the president, and then post the photos on facebook. i'm tired of all these wanna be celebrities in america actin' an ass. enough is a fuckin 'nuff....how did they get through clearance? where's the security? where are the necessary arrests that need to be made? this isn't some random college party you crashed. this is the leader of the nation, the most powerful man alive. you crash his party and nobody goes to jail? nobody gets fired? SOMEBODY got to go to jail...it's that simple. they need to be stoned for puttin the security of barack obama in danger. 
2. chris brown - i didn't know chris brown had it in him...his name now is synonymous with woman beating. he received his punishment through court, and every chance he gets, he apologizes to rihanna. we get the point nigga...although i don't like how she decided to talk about the situation when she started promoting her album, i'll let it slide. only because he shouldn't have hit her...according to tmz, she hit him first in the car and he snapped. he then hit her as he drove. if a woman hits you, just leave her and don't put yourself in a situation to catch a case.....tmz is efficient. i'm keeping my dirt on the low. tmz will find you out 
1. conrad murray - this nigga here....when you kill michael jackson, you are public enemy #1. i hope he gets a prison sentence, and gets anally assaulted for every day of his sentence. he gave michael jackson an excess of propofol. that shit doesn't even sound helpful...and, the muthafucka didn't call the cops for 45 minutes after he found out jackson was unconscious. murray's going to jail.... how the fuck you kill michael jackson? i still can't believe he's dead.
merry christmas to everyone who reads our blog. i love you all.....bitches.
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