Saturday, July 27, 2013

A few thoughts on Brooklyn

So I'm in Brooklyn visiting for a couple of weeks.  I love Brooklyn. Here are a list of some of my observations.

1.  Hot hipster bitches.  They are everywhere! And its a beautiful thing.  Light skinned Dark skinned Asian AND White Women...what a sight to behold.  Like rare wild birds who strut the concrete jungle with a smug sense of entitlement.

2. Its slow.  Its like Brooklyn is stoned all the time and its more successful big brother Manhattan has all the shiny things but also a permanent stick up its own ass.

3. The Food.  Brooklyn is obsessed with food trends.  Not in a bad or good way.  The way I see it as long as the food is good I could care less if you're a contradiction of yourself.  Like a soul food restaurant in the North, that uses only farm-to-table and holistic ingredients...

4. The G and L Train.  Just wash your hands after riding that bitch.  The dirty crust punks with the smelly ass armpits probably didn't and they just shoved their anti-manicured hands in their beard to grab a piece of day-old bread which they subsequently ate.

5.  Seeing people you know from cities you lived in in the past is not always a good thing.  Me and a buddy walked past this bar and a chick I knew from drinking heavily during grad school spotted us.  I forgot how loud she was.  Lost my voice trying to have a conversation with her ass.  Stayed out till 4 am which at my age now takes 24 hours to recover from.  But my homie smashed her so good for him...

6.  The people are friendly.  People have this misconception about people from NY as if theyre all ass holes.  Simply not the case.  Most people are happy to help your lost ass not waste money getting on wrong the subway.  Just ask!

7. The girls are slick.  Haven't had girls just give me their number anywhere else like they do here.  BUT the slickest was at the bar last night I took a picture of this crazy looking DJ who was playing.  This girl came up to me and was like "I like that picture you got of the DJ can you send them to me?" I tipped my hat in approval and obliged. ----->

8. Brooklyn is cheap.  Cheap to live cheap to eat. Close to EVERYTHING you could possibly want to do EVER.

9.   People here do believe that this place is the end all be all.  That no city compares and that if you're  struggling here, it's better than being a success somewhere else.  I'm sorry Brooklynites, thats
not the way it goes...

10.   No doubt New York is the greatest city in the world, but there's no place like home


CtotheB said...

Sounds like Williamsburg. Ain't nothing like Brooklyn in the summertime!

Jonny Casanova said...

The bar I was at was in Williamsburg. And I agree with you on the awesomeness of a Brooklyn summer.