First of all I would like to touch on a little thing called perspective. Sometimes understanding another perspective can be the difference maker in how you make a decision. Perspective is the motivation behind why and how people do things (good or bad) . Speaking of perspective let me introduce you to 3 characters that you know very well maybe not by name but read along and you’ll understand what I’m saying.
Meet Jarrod a young man in his early 20s, recent graduate , has a good job, he is nice, smart and was raised well. This guy is going places and he has a great girlfriend whom he cares for a lot. They are fairly serious having been together for 9 months of relationship bliss. That great girlfriends name is Jessica. She is one of those girls who didn’t know they were fine until just recently. Hasn’t had many boyfriends, you know the type, the girls who are still genuinely sweet and haven’t been tarnished by the pain of heartbreak from the ex-scum bag that all girls carry around like a huge purse full of excuses for why all guys suck. Instead of the past scum bag, she carries around an insecurity from only recently being as fine as she is and never fully getting used to so much attention. This brings up the final piece of the puzzle. Jessica has this friend, we’ll call this girl Lucretia. Lucretia is fine, and smart, used to attention from guys, and probably would be in a relationship if it wasn’t for her stank ass attitude, judgmental nature, and smug sense of entitlement that she carries. Not to mention the ever present past scum bag that most girls keep on-hand. Needless to say, Jarrod and Lucretia don’t get along because Jarrod “is a guy and guys aren’t to be trusted” she says.
Ok now that the stage is set we can get into the storyline. Read on as a typical situation unfolds before your very eyes.
So Jarrod had a hard day at work, in fact hard is an understatement. He got swamped so much so that he had to bring some of his work home this time. He is exhausted and just wants to chill and have some time to himself. Jessica calls Jarrod later on that day and Jarrod reluctantly picks up after opening eyes and lifting his head off his desk and says.
“Let me talk to you a lil bit later I had a hard day and I just wanna chill. Still haven’t finished my worked and I have to put it on my bosses desk the day after tomorrow.”
Jessica, being the understanding girl friend that she is, hangs up the phone and although she wanted to talk she knows it wasn’t THAT important so she lets it go. She calls Lucretia to tell her whatever dumb unimportant thing she was gonna tell Jarrod and in the conversation she lets slip that Jarrod couldn’t talk cuz he was busy. Lucretia, who can only give advice based on her numerous, yet failed attempts at keeping a man explains to Jessica that Jarrod is breaking routine and that she should be suspicious. In fact she shouldn’t call him she should wait on him to make the move. Why does she care? The next day Jessica and Lucretia go to the mall and Jessica’s phone rings. She shuffles to grab her phone thinking it was Jarrod but it wasn’t. She’s upset for the rest of the time at the mall and goes home early wondering why Jarrod still hasn’t called. Lucretia, pissed off that her shopping buddy has gone home, calls Jarrod asking him why he hasn’t called yet and why he’s trippin why he insists on making her friend upset. Jarrod is first off confused and still trying to get his work done and secondly wondering “Why do you care?” Pissed off and taken off focus he calls Jessica and explains what was happening that nothing was going on and that it wasn’t her it was his work and that was bothering him. He asks her if she wants to catch a movie later on that night and grab ice cream after. She excitedly accepts his offer.
Its 10 o’clock and the couple are out of the movie headed to Coldstone. Meanwhile Lucretia is sitting on her couch alone watching Fresh Prince reruns and still wondering what happened with Jessica so she calls to see if she “caught that trifling ass nigga Jarrod?” Why does she care? *side note* (Lucretia will receive a call at about 3 am that night from an ex scum bag. At approx. 3:25 she’ll have her legs in the air on his moms futon…think about it) Jessica takes a swallow of her butter pecan ice cream smiles and says “don’t worry everything’s fine.” Jarrod hears her and asks “ is that Lucretia? Tell that b*tch to stay the f*ck up out our business! What we do has nothing to do with her!!! Why does she care anyway!?!?”
Granted, Jarrod should have watched his language at Coldstone. There are kids in there on Fridays, but Jarrod has a right to be pissed. Why DOES she care? Why do girls always have one trifling ass friend who is determined to systematically cause tension in a relationship with constant spoon feedings of bullshit, non-pertinent stories of ex scumbags until the couple is as miserable as she is.
To the girls who love to give advice based on some negative experience that they’ve gone through, STOP and think about why your single. Is it really by choice, or are you just trying to tell yourself that? Better yet, ask yourself, “Why do I care?”