Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Why Do You Care?!?!

First of all I would like to touch on a little thing called perspective. Sometimes understanding another perspective can be the difference maker in how you make a decision. Perspective is the motivation behind why and how people do things (good or bad) . Speaking of perspective let me introduce you to 3 characters that you know very well maybe not by name but read along and you’ll understand what I’m saying.

Meet Jarrod a young man in his early 20s, recent graduate , has a good job, he is nice, smart and was raised well. This guy is going places and he has a great girlfriend whom he cares for a lot. They are fairly serious having been together for 9 months of relationship bliss. That great girlfriends name is Jessica. She is one of those girls who didn’t know they were fine until just recently. Hasn’t had many boyfriends, you know the type, the girls who are still genuinely sweet and haven’t been tarnished by the pain of heartbreak from the ex-scum bag that all girls carry around like a huge purse full of excuses for why all guys suck. Instead of the past scum bag, she carries around an insecurity from only recently being as fine as she is and never fully getting used to so much attention. This brings up the final piece of the puzzle. Jessica has this friend, we’ll call this girl Lucretia. Lucretia is fine, and smart, used to attention from guys, and probably would be in a relationship if it wasn’t for her stank ass attitude, judgmental nature, and smug sense of entitlement that she carries. Not to mention the ever present past scum bag that most girls keep on-hand. Needless to say, Jarrod and Lucretia don’t get along because Jarrod “is a guy and guys aren’t to be trusted” she says.

Ok now that the stage is set we can get into the storyline. Read on as a typical situation unfolds before your very eyes.

So Jarrod had a hard day at work, in fact hard is an understatement. He got swamped so much so that he had to bring some of his work home this time. He is exhausted and just wants to chill and have some time to himself. Jessica calls Jarrod later on that day and Jarrod reluctantly picks up after opening eyes and lifting his head off his desk and says.

“Let me talk to you a lil bit later I had a hard day and I just wanna chill. Still haven’t finished my worked and I have to put it on my bosses desk the day after tomorrow.”

Jessica, being the understanding girl friend that she is, hangs up the phone and although she wanted to talk she knows it wasn’t THAT important so she lets it go. She calls Lucretia to tell her whatever dumb unimportant thing she was gonna tell Jarrod and in the conversation she lets slip that Jarrod couldn’t talk cuz he was busy. Lucretia, who can only give advice based on her numerous, yet failed attempts at keeping a man explains to Jessica that Jarrod is breaking routine and that she should be suspicious. In fact she shouldn’t call him she should wait on him to make the move. Why does she care? The next day Jessica and Lucretia go to the mall and Jessica’s phone rings. She shuffles to grab her phone thinking it was Jarrod but it wasn’t. She’s upset for the rest of the time at the mall and goes home early wondering why Jarrod still hasn’t called. Lucretia, pissed off that her shopping buddy has gone home, calls Jarrod asking him why he hasn’t called yet and why he’s trippin why he insists on making her friend upset. Jarrod is first off confused and still trying to get his work done and secondly wondering “Why do you care?” Pissed off and taken off focus he calls Jessica and explains what was happening that nothing was going on and that it wasn’t her it was his work and that was bothering him. He asks her if she wants to catch a movie later on that night and grab ice cream after. She excitedly accepts his offer.

Its 10 o’clock and the couple are out of the movie headed to Coldstone. Meanwhile Lucretia is sitting on her couch alone watching Fresh Prince reruns and still wondering what happened with Jessica so she calls to see if she “caught that trifling ass nigga Jarrod?” Why does she care? *side note* (Lucretia will receive a call at about 3 am that night from an ex scum bag. At approx. 3:25 she’ll have her legs in the air on his moms futon…think about it) Jessica takes a swallow of her butter pecan ice cream smiles and says “don’t worry everything’s fine.” Jarrod hears her and asks “ is that Lucretia? Tell that b*tch to stay the f*ck up out our business! What we do has nothing to do with her!!! Why does she care anyway!?!?”

Granted, Jarrod should have watched his language at Coldstone. There are kids in there on Fridays, but Jarrod has a right to be pissed. Why DOES she care? Why do girls always have one trifling ass friend who is determined to systematically cause tension in a relationship with constant spoon feedings of bullshit, non-pertinent stories of ex scumbags until the couple is as miserable as she is.

To the girls who love to give advice based on some negative experience that they’ve gone through, STOP and think about why your single. Is it really by choice, or are you just trying to tell yourself that? Better yet, ask yourself, “Why do I care?”


Dead Mike said...

Tell all this to shortie on BG's post.

DJ M said...

ohhh but this is sooo true. i've seen it w/ girls i've interacted with, and have seen it even in girls who my friends have interacted with.

Jonny Casanova said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jonny Casanova said...

No dis Dorian but i had to pull it. We gotta hold the govt names on the blog. but it was nice talking to you the other day. and thanks for reading.

ELA Exclusive said...

I'm mad that you repremanded Jarrod for cursing in Coldstone! He needs to punch himself in the face for giving Lucretia his number.

We all know that close friends talk about their relationships, but it is not the job of a friend to say what or do what her punk ass friend can't, or won't do. Why? Because it is not her relationship!!! If I acted out on everytime some dude did one of my friends dirty, I would have a few aggravated assault charges by now.

I agree, Jessica should tell her girl to stay where she belongs ... on the sidelines. But, she should also get on her man for talking to her friend that way ... 'cause even though he was right ... he was dead wrong for that! Probably interrupted some poor worker on a double singing to a bratty kid who just spilled his "gotta have it" chocolate with gummy bears all over the counter ... damn!

Ashley_Rob said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Dead Mike said...

Same to you ashley. We appreciate your continuing support but please leave gov't names out. Feel free to repost w/o JC's name.

Maestro said...

Oh I see this all the time. I think you answered your own question as to why girls have that one "trifling" friend. It's because they've been hurt in the past and never took the time to heal from the relationship that hurt them. The way they deal with the hurt is by choosing to hate rather than forgive and they believe they're doing the right thing by spreading that resentment because they think they're protecting their friends.

When their friends meet guys different from the one who hurt them, they find it hard to believe or too good to be true because they've never been with anyone like that. The fact is you can never truly cherrish and appreciate happiness unless you've been hurt before. Until girls like Lucretia let go of that past, they'll never be happy and will be less likely to find who they're meant to be with.

Jonny Casanova said...

Maestro...U have captured the true meaning behind my article. Thanks for your comment.

Wistopher said...

OMG this is truism at it's finest!

the BIGGER question is WHY do girls continue to LISTEN to their SINGLE ASS FRIENDS?!?! there is a REASON why they're single!!!

it's all about communication! don't speculate about what may or may not be going on with your bf/gf. Eff all the BS games and CALL/TEXT/E-MAIL to find out what is really goin down. Don't ask your friends to pontificate some reason cuz 9 times out of 10 they will be WRONG.AS.HELL!


Mary said...

I think girls just need to stop telling their single friends all their business. If your girlfriend is going to all her friends complaining about you and talking shit about what you are or are not doing, then you can't say anything when her friends have something to say, because she brought them in on it. You need to tell yo girl to keep her mouth shut and stop going to her friends and come and talk to you about problems or issues she may be having with the relationship. Period.