Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Movin' Forward

Ok, so ya boy has relocated to Alexandria, VA in another step of moving forward. A lot of people would be afraid to make a jump on a limb such as this, and I am no exception. I love my apartment, I love the area and I’m sure I’ll love the life I’m going to create out here. The only thing missing is the people I have gotten to know over the past couple of years in my adult life. Why must society dictate that I start my life over again after a certain period of time?

Moving forward to me is like performing the tripudium, a sacred dance of the Jewish religion. This dance is translated to mean transport of joy. In this dance one takes three steps forward and then one step backward to symbolize moving forward but always remembering what has been done in the past, whether its deeds, words said or, most importantly, the people we have met and have deemed them worthy of friendship. Why can’t that one step back be me picking up what I love in the past and bringing it with me rather than just remembering?

It’s crazy when I look out my window how I no longer see the trees in my front yard of little Kannapolis, NC. Instead I see a Shell gas station and a bunch of people who could give two shits about me. Which is cool cuz the feeling is somewhat mutual. The only difference is if they wanted to me to give a shit, I most definitely would. I wanna find people like me. But for a recent college grad who lived with his best friends for the past four years it’s a weird feeling to not be able to have an impromptu lunch and such. Like I’m embracing this new life all together but a nigga misses the simple things in life like the meal plan, just swipe and eat. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I feel that all the people out there who fall into all the “proper” ways of initiating a conversation and a friendship don’t really wanna do it just like I don’t. I think both parties would rather just be like “let’s be friends” and that’s it, no fluff. No tom foolery. The real world can be a bitch.

I’m used to the fantasy world that is college. I know everyone, and know who to chill wit and who to avoid, esp at my small alma mater. Moving forward onto meeting new people and discovering different nuisances in life is for the birds if you ask me. Why is life designed to get us into the perfect groove with the perfect people in the perfect situation, just to say “ok negro, its been long enough, pack your shit and become uncomfortable again!” It’s been happening since elementary school for me as I’m an original native of New York to be moved to west bumfuck North Carolina. And everyone else has had the same in the transference of schools. College had parties with my friends, plenty of people who were similar to me with similar goals and free alcohol. Why must society dictate that I start my life over again after a certain period of time?

6 yrs of elementary school, 3 yrs of middle school, 4 yrs of high school, 4 years of college, 4 yrs of working for a company or the military to pay for those 4 yrs of college all to get to a point where don’t shit change and you begin to get bored with the mundane lifestyle. I say fuck that. Let me pick which segment of life I get stuck with.

I’ll take college please.

Black, white, young or old and everything in between we must move forward… but why? It’s my life, but if I don’t move forward I’m a bum right? Let me have my friends, let me have my own way of life and let me sip the free hops and spirits of my rich college friends.
Don’t make me argue with some chick in the local Giant grocery store about giving me my buy one get one free on whey protein powder. Don’t make me avoid bums outside of the local Safeway who wants a specific 13 fuckin’ cents. Don’t make me pay for this God awful rent and pay utilities. Let me chill on my porch with some cheap beer, with my fam and friends and play cornhole til I get drunk and want some ass. Let me live the life I’m used to. Let me not move forward.

L’Chaim……. P!ed P!per

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